Releasing Trauma and Shame
Restoring and Enhancing Pleasure

Blog Born Naked

Sacred Sexual Rites

All my life I have been a channel for Innana, a dedicated, yet secret, Sacred Whore and Temple Priestess of Her Sacred Sexual Rites.

There are many parts to my life story, it is a tale of  Sex, healing and shame, longing and love. I want to tell you of Sex, Blood and Birth and Full Moon MagicAll my life I have been a channel for Innana, a dedicated, yet secret, Temple Priestess of Her sacred sexual rites.

There are many parts to my story, it is a tale o sex, healing and shame, longing and love. I want to tell you of Sex, Blood and Birth and Full Moon Magic

  I have decided that FB, in our digital age, is a channel for the Goddess as she returns from her Dark Moon Phase, a sort of digital temple if you will. So I meet you here.

Do you believe in Reincarnation or maybe Genetic memory? That every woman (men too) that allows  themselves to hear the call can channel the Goddess in their unique way, into the world? I believe this and yet my path as Sacred Whore frightens me!  I know the risks and have paid the price, in this life and in lives past.

I remember when women and men like me were burned alive. I remember rape, in this life and in times long past. I have known the hatred, envy and the twisted desire generated by a woman like me daring to share her natural born sexual and spiritual self. I have also know the joy, the freedom and the exultation of serving Goddess and sharing pleasure. The World is truly redeemed with every act of pleasure!

Sometimes I think that this place within me is so deep, so Ancient, so far beyond this time and place, perhaps it is forbidden to share it here in this profane world of the 21st Century? But if I and the many others called don't do it now, when will any woman or man feel safe to do so?

Yes,  I feel  called by Goddess to be her Priestess and proclaim Her return.

Still I tremble at the thought of sharing Her Sacred Erotic Ritual  to  larger groups.

If you feel the call, join me and my Priest, Dragon Sundancer at the Center For Sex and Culture
1349 Mission St, San Francisco, CA 94103 for an exhibition of his erotic art,

Friday, December 11, 2015 at 7PM

It will be an evening to remember  of Art, Wine, Erotic Ritual and Performance. Snacks will be served and the Event is Free.


I Woke Up Feeling Thankful

I  woke up feeling grateful and then laughed as I realized it was Thanksgiving day!

I was grateful that after several years of waking up everyday with anxiety, I now wake up, almost everyday, to happiness! I look forward to my days.

I'm thankful to the people and events that have brought me to this place.

Thank you Dennis Avelli for your gift of love and the blessing of knowing and loving you, may your next life be filled with joy and pleasure, Dragon for loving me and everything you are, Margret Wade for your perfectly timed words of encouragement a few years ago when I was at my lowest point, Douw Smith for being my Rolfer and for the depths we explored together, Debra Anapol for encouraging me to learn and teach Pelvic Heart Integration and for your guidance from the other side, Ah for taking me traveling to Ecuador and your healing energy, Rebecca Tozer for your breathwork and your warrior spirit, Dan Karpf for being my oldest friend, Linda P for your friendship and Healing Touch, Pamela M, for the books you mailed me, your brilliant writing and bright courageous spirit, Joseph Kramer for your ever constant genius and inspiration, Cleo for being who you are and for the Dominant Woman's Intensive, Fakir for continuing to manifest your connection to Spirit, to Sylvia for believing in the SexPower Tarot and your presence in my life, for Ganymede my high Priest, all my yoga teachers (particularly Leslie Howard and Vicki Bell), David Bercelli for developing TRE and showing me how to loosen my diaphragm, Susan Shifman for ushering me though the level 1 TRE training and for being a role model, Vyana for your support when I needed it, Barbara English for being a Vegan and all you do, Brook Deputy for certifying me in TRE, Bill for your warmth, Sheila Rubin for liberating my creativity to share my story and to Bret Lyon for guiding me back from PTSD and forward into the work I love doing, Bruce for diving deep in perfect trust, there are more, all my fellow explorers in the workshops and trainings I have been taking (Glen Meader Kimba, , my students and clients, my friends and community members. THANK YOU ALL!

Dinosaur Sex: Why You Aren't Having It (And How You Can)

Please tell me what you think and give some feedback or suggestions if you would email is

Dinosaur Sex and Why You Aren't Having It (And How You Can)

To paraphrase Wilhelm Riech, in the Mystery of the Orgasm, when sex is truly ecstatic, as it was meant to be, we pulse like a jellyfish, undulate with the sensuousness of a snake and experience a direct connection to our lizard (Dinosaur) brain as we feel ourselves tremor, tingle and vibrate as our body moves in spontaneous, mostly  involuntary, rhythmical ways and we feel waves of intensely pleasurable energy streamings in every part of our body. We breathe in certain patterns until our entire body experiences a mind blowing orgasm. This full body organism is necessary to our organisms health and emotional wellbeing and the ability to have this experience of sex is a sign of optimal emotional and mental health. It comes evolutionarily straight out of the oldest, most primitive part of our brain, our brain stem. Called the lizard or reptile brain it is the part of our brain we share with the Dinosaur.
So why don't most "civilized" humans experience this Dinosaur sex?

Repression, shame and trauma is not just in the mind.
We hold the trauma, shaming and repression experienced as children (and sometimes as adults) in every part of our body organism and it manifests as:

Impaired Proprioception resulting in restricted movement in our muscles, joints and tendons,

Constricted blood vessels and impaired heart rate  (think heart disease)

Rigidly held pelvis, tight Psoas and pelvic floor muscles (painful intercourse and incontinence for women, premature ejaculation and prostrate difficulty for men and it makes it harder to really dance)

Tight diaphragm and inadequate, shallow or irregular  breathing,

Disruption of neuro pathways, immature nervous system ( think chronic pain, reduced pleasure)

Hormonal disruption, chemical imbalances in oxytocin, cortisol, serotonin uptake (depression)

A general lack of embodiment, being "out of touch" with our body.

In this way repression, shame and trauma robs us of our natural ability to have spine tinkling, life enhancing, ecstatic sexual experiences as well as diminishing our overall pleasure in living. This sucks, basically. Reich called this Body Armoring brought on by the Emotional Plague. 

OK The Bad News. We got screwed up as children, we still carry it in every cell of our body and brain and it blocks us from having our full pleasure.

The Good News. We can easily start having more pleasure right now and we can enjoy the lifelong adventure of freeing ourselves from societies craziness around sex, pleasure and loving our bodies.

You want to know how to start having more pleasure, easily, right now, right? Do something to feel your body more. A few deep breaths, bring your awareness into your feet, rub your hands together and place them on your heart. Slow down and sink into your body. No expectations. After a moment thank your body for all it does. Make this a practice, a meditation, set your intention to welcome in more pleasure and follow where it leads. First I realized I didn't fully breathe, I felt my rock hard neck and shoulder muscles and the tightness of my body, it felt like a prison. That painful awareness lead me to yoga and massage, to getting Rolfed, to Tantra, dance and Sacred Kink workshops, to eating better, to soaking in hot water, to Pelvic Heart Integration, to TRE (Tension and Trauma Releasing Exercises) to somatic therapy to heal shame, to Conscious Breathing and to being out in nature. I'm still being led, still on the journey, but my body is no longer my prison but a source of pleasure, joy, wisdom and freedom. Blessings on all our journeys. Namaste!

Any Two People (Can Have Great Sex)

When I was in my late twenties, a very wise woman, Maryhelen Snyder PhD. then age 50, said to me, "I really don't see why any two people (with good intentions) shouldn't be able to have a good time together sexually." I was shocked by her statement at the time, and it didn't matter that I had been sexual with many people- in fact my experience made me wonder all the more at what she said, because I wouldn't have said that I had had very much pleasure with most of my numerous sexual partners, even with the one that I most deeply loved. I had suffered sexual abuse at such an early age and while sex had been passionately ecstatic in my teens, more and more it had become a source of anxiety in my twenties. Still her words stayed with me, I believed that she was right in theory, but I didn't think it could be possible, for me, in the sexually screwed up world of the twentieth century. At 34 I met my life partner, Dragon, and sex was great. I also connected with a gifted therapist, Jeffery Fine. They helped me to heal and integrate sexually.

I was over 40 when the life changing truth of Maryhelen's words became personal for me. As Dragon and I began to explore Tantra, Sex Magic and Sacred Kink in the early Nineties, I also realized that I needed to broaden the concept from "any two people" to include 3,4 or 5 people as Dragon and I learned how to expand our love. I was over 50 and beginning a new century when, at the Body Electric 5 day intensive for men and women, called Two Spirits, I was able to TRULY practice it. It was here, with touch from two men I had only just met that I experienced my first full body orgasm. After this mind blowing experience in 2002, I had a splendid erotic time in my personal life, in several more Body Electric Intensives and in my Sexological Bodywork Professional Training*, with every one I partnered with. In these trainings we connected, at random, in twos or threes; thin, fat, tall, short, twenty something's to eighty something, pierced and tattooed, Hipster and Republican, Jewish, White, Black, Asian, Hispanic. Amazing as it would have seemed to me in my twenties, it was always good! I learned. I grew, and my heart and body opened, I felt closer to Spirit and to other people then I ever could have imagined. I found pleasure with Gay men and straight women as well as lesbian women, women that had been men, Trans men and Heterosexual men.

I found that it really took very little: respect, presence, basic techniques for connection and pleasure and "safe sex". So simple, once I got there, 25 years after Maryhelen's words had planted the seed. To find my pleasure, I had had to unlearn a lifetime of sex negative conditioning and to heal from the grievous sexual wounding that I had suffered.

*In the interest of clarity, at the Body Electric Intensives, pleasure was experienced through touching of the total body including genital and anal internal massage, by the participants using their hands and, sometimes, toys. Because of safe sex protocol there was no oral sex or penile penetration.
Sexological Bodywork is a profession certified by the State of California through the Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality. The practitioner is clothed and the touch is one way.

One of the most important things that I have learned is that both sexual pleasure and intimacy can be a thing apart from "baby making".